(After darkness, I hope for light)
How strange and how sad it would be if I didn't feel grief for that which I now find I have lost.
The depth of my pain is but a reflection of the intensity and meaning that this [dream] had...at its ending....
How sad if all was not as it is and will be...
I know I will feel more pain before I start to feel the joy again....
I will feel the anger, the indignation, the betrayal, the disbelief and the despair. Pain. Grief.
I will grieve....
One may have peaked to try to guess the ending of this saga...
One may think one knows how it will all unfold... in the end
One will find ones guesses count for little.
It is not until you have ridden every bump...
Lost your seat and come adrift at the corners and the hurdles...
Not until you have turned every page will you truly understand the meaning and the purpose of this journey.
It is scary: it hurts when we crash.
The consequences of making a wrong turn can be frightening.
The fear can tie one in knots.
It is learning to drive all over again.
So many new skills to master, so much to learn.
But you know that in the end that this will set you free.
One will do more than learn to drive...one will fly.
Pages will be turned...
Out of adversity is born strength.
Vici gratias ago vos meus amicus
Thank you for holding me and drying my tears.
Where would we be without friends?
"Veritas Vos Liberabit"
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What a magical, spiritual post, my dearest.
ReplyDeleteI am right with you on this one. Knowing "it's all good" doesn't remove the sadness and pain we experience, but it does give us hope.
And at our age (oh - so there is something good about getting old - ha-ha!) we already have enough life experience to be able to look back and clearly see how some of the most disappointing and hurtful experiences we've walked through have wound up being the biggest blessings.
Still - grief is grief and must be openly felt. That is how we cleanse and move forward without more baggage.
What a blessing you are to me! ...and thank goodness, just a simple God send without any painful beginnings!
Love you to pieces my sweet Bean!